ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
where are you?
Hypothermia
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
