I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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