You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
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