ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
