Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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