haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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