32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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