its not stalking. its research.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
