I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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