I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
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