The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
