Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Randomize
