My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
