So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I think your dad took our porno
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Randomize
