Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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