Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
