Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
