i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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