READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
