I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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