goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Do vagina's smell?
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize
