3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Randomize
