you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
