porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
