Yo dont text me then not text me
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
