yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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