I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
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You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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