so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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