I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I checked into jail on foursquare
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize