AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
