I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
