The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
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You know, be my cock's hype man.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
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Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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