if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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