it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
