Christians are straight up FREAKS
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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