Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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