Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
