dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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