my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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