Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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