i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
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