Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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