just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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