your parents love me but you hate me
hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
