Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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