I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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