when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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