Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
How does one acquire holy water?
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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