Texts From Last Night

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  (314): View more from Missouri

  So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Most never. Some around 65.

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  (314): So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title? (816): Most never. Some around 65. http://tfl.nu/dvz5
  Replies (22) Good night (2262) Bad night (716)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.

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  (617): it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before. http://tfl.nu/1u0r
  Replies (20) Good night (621) Bad night (3733)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow

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  (908): this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow http://tfl.nu/cbkl
  Replies (12) Good night (694) Bad night (4381)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.

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  (910): It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me. http://tfl.nu/w40e
  Replies (34) Good night (1529) Bad night (4459)
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  (361): View more from Texas

  He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.

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  (361): He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears. http://tfl.nu/n3l2
  Replies (7) Good night (1016) Bad night (2779)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex

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  (519): I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex http://tfl.nu/b3wh
  Replies (15) Good night (1118) Bad night (2391)
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  (310): View more from California

  That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI

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  (310): That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI http://tfl.nu/k5sn
  Replies (14) Good night (657) Bad night (1451)
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  (916): View more from California

  My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.

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  (916): My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher. http://tfl.nu/1p6a
  Replies (2) Good night (1363) Bad night (1154)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.

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  (817): The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride. http://tfl.nu/s0ye
  Replies (1) Good night (459) Bad night (786)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.

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  (601): He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT. http://tfl.nu/hra9
  Replies (23) Good night (2936) Bad night (701)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend

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  (630): how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend http://tfl.nu/zm88
  Replies (4) Good night (1044) Bad night (373)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.

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  (608): Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants. http://tfl.nu/jnxo
  Replies (4) Good night (784) Bad night (352)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing

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  (403): the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing http://tfl.nu/cpea
  Replies (9) Good night (1409) Bad night (313)
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  (585): View more from New York

  shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry

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  (585): shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry http://tfl.nu/7vhr
  Replies (0) Good night (316) Bad night (363)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.

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  (973): Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts. http://tfl.nu/8jrx
  Replies (4) Good night (256) Bad night (346)

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