Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
